The other day I saw a post on the famous Norfolk Milso’s page and it caught my attention enough for me to read the 67 comments.  I rarely read these posts because, per usual, they are full of catfights.  In this post, certain wives were bashing another wife who openly admitted she couldn’t handle living in Virginia and was needing to get rid of some of her stuff since she had no where to keep it when she moved back home.  She simply asked where she could take her things and sell them.  Most wives were helpful, but a few were downright ugly to this poor woman who openly admitted her struggle and just needed help.  I saw comments like “You signed up for this lifestyle and should have known if you could handle it not before you made the decision” and others like, “Wow, I can’t believe you would just leave your husband like that.”  I was astounded that people really had the nerve to say these things.  I had to stop reading because the comments only got worse. 

So here’s my issue… why can’t people, especially those who love you or are in the same boat as you, be supportive?  Why must people pass judgement?  Do they not understand that judgement doesn’t help the situation?  

Why is this post personal?  It’s personal because I have encountered more judgement in the past two years during my relationship with Cody than I ever have in my whole entire life.  Maybe judgement comes with getting older.  Maybe not.  Maybe it’s because I was surrounding myself with the wrong people.  Maybe I’m too sensitive.  Who knows.

 I got married at 20 years old three months after we got engaged – boom – Maddie must be pregnant.  Wrong. 

I spent a lot of time traveling home to Texas – boom – Maddie is wrong she didn’t stay with her husband more.  Dumb. If you don’t spend time apart, you don’t build trust and you don’t build strength.

I don’t have a job in Virginia – boom – Maddie is lazy.  You obviously don’t know me.

I’m moving home this summer – boom – Maddie and Cody must be having problems.  Try getting to know us and you’ll know we are doing great. <3  

If I live 20 hours away from my husband for the next year or so – boom – Cody and I will be overcome by temptation.  Seriously? 

Do you get my point?  Passing judgement helps absolutely nothing at all.  Maybe try passing along some encouragement or some support.  A few people I know really support the fact that we are 21 and 23 and we pay our bills, manage to save money, and sit side by side on the couch to work on our homework in order to provide a better future for ourselves and for our family. 

I know many of you have probably felt this way.  I know I’m not alone.  If you’re reading this, I challenge you to stop yourself when you catch yourself beginning to judge someone.  I challenge you to share words of encouragement with someone you love or someone you don’t even know.  You can change the world with small acts of kindness and kind, supportive words will do the trick.  You don’t know every detail to every story and you shouldn’t place judgement on anyone, but that doesn’t mean you can’t leave a positive impact on their situation.  I’m sorry to bring you such a serious post on Monday but this was weighing on my heart. 

Anyways, happy Monday y’all! Enjoy some fun pictures of my little family! Cody has turned out to be quite the photographer! xoxo